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MY STUDENT HAS A FAMILY MEMBER WITH CANCER
How Cancer in the Family Affects Children
How Teachers Can Help
It is undeniably difficult to deal with a family member's cancer
diagnosis and treatments at any age. When a sibling or parent has
cancer, school-age children can manifest their concerns in myriad
ways. Maintaining a sense of normalcy during this time is important
for the child, and school is part of the child's routine.
Below, you can find information that may be helpful if a child in
your class has a family member with cancer.
How Cancer in the Family Affects Children
Dealing with the serious illness of a close family member can evoke
many conflicting emotions for children. Feelings of fear, sadness,
anger, confusion, jealousy, guilt, and loneliness are common. The
changes in home and family routines that usually accompany cancer
diagnoses and treatments can easily extend to school. Children may
act in ways that are atypical for them, or they may resort to attention-seeking
behaviors that are dangerous or young for their age. A child whose
sibling or parent has cancer may begin to act up or do poorly in
lessons. Conversely, an outgoing child might become quiet and insecure.
Sudden changes in a child's temperament or school performance can
reflect the difficulties commonly experienced when a close family
member has cancer. It is worth noting that the emotions and behavior
changes a child experiences when a family member has cancer can
be intensified when it is the child's parent or caregiver.
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How Teachers Can Help
As a teacher, you are in a unique position to notice changes in
the child's moods and social interactions. If the child's
sibling has cancer and is close in age or goes to the same school,
peers may ask the child questions about his or her sibling's
absences from school or tease the child about catching cancer. It
can often help if a child can talk to someone outside of the family
about his or her feelings. If appropriate, you can offer to be that
person by telling the child that he or she can feel comfortable
talking to you, or you may wish to suggest other resources for the
child, such as the school nurse or counselor. You may also be able
to help the child do research to learn about the type of cancer
and treatment his or her family member is going through, which can
help the child cope with this situation.
Because young children spend
so much time in school, it often helps if teachers are aware
that a child in the class has a family member with cancer.
Parents dealing with cancer in the family may not share this
news with teachers in a timely manner, or at all. This is
a personal decision, and it should be respected. If you are
informed of cancer in the family of one of your students,
try to keep the lines of communication open and work with
the family to be an additional support to them during this
difficult time.
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